Joy

Call Upon the Lord

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

Call Upon the Lord

The song Call upon the Lord by Elevation Worship has been on repeat for a few weeks now (lyrics below).  I cannot get enough of it. I play it over and over again. Its theme will never get old, out dated, or worn out. Call upon the Lord and He WILL rescue and save; He WILL bring peace and healing.

“We need no other hiding place. Our hope is safe within Your name.” This is so beautiful. When we are tired, worn out or weary, Jesus is our hiding place.  His covering blocks out the noise, chaos, fear and uncertainty that the world relentlessly shouts. In His presence, we don’t have to listen to it. Our hope for safety, to be rescued, for healing and restoration, for receiving forgiveness and offering it to others, is all safe with Jesus. He won’t crush our hope; He restores it.  He won’t dash or mock our dreams; He planted them inside us and expands them and opens doors that only He can; He doesn’t withhold and punish; He died in our place, so we could have life with Him forever.   The hope and faith that He hears me, sees me and knows me; every single situation, wound, heart break and victory, which fashioned me into who I am, kept me hanging on through some heavy trauma and pain I have experienced.  Knowing that what He began He WILL sustain; knowing that Jesus has a plan and purpose behind my wounds brings hope. Those wounds are now scars, because of His healing.  I’m not anonymous, forgotten or forsaken.  In fact, I am so deeply known that I am free! Jesus’ name heals.  He alone is strong enough to save. There is power in the name of Jesus.

At His name “every enemy will flee, as we declare Your victory!” Jesus is our victory. He defied death, defeated the enemy of our souls once and for all, and He offers life to all who call His name. He is right there next to you, as you read these words. He is the breath in your lungs, the beat of your heart. There is nothing about you He doesn’t already know. No secrets with Jesus. He sees you; He sees me. He alone breaks down every stronghold we erect to protect and wall ourselves away from pain. He knows why those walls were erected. He was there. He watched us build them. The pain you and I try to hide with our walls, break His heart. Your walls probably look different than mine. A wall could look like pride, arrogance, self-reliance, fear, needing to be right, promiscuity, coldness, being shut off from others, sarcasm, humor, obsession with our looks, weight and appearance, and the list could go on. Jesus knows better than we do, why we felt we needed those walls.  He waits to be invited into our lives. He is a gentleman.  He doesn’t force Himself. Jesus will meet every need we have, even that niggling, ever present pricking, that we don’t fully understand; He does. He is enough.

In my own life, I have experienced healing and restoration from things so broken and devastated, I honestly never thought any of it could be healed or restored. I heard Jesus speak to my spirit and say words so similar to these lyrics, “RISE! Your shackles are no more, for I (Jesus Christ) have broken every chain!” He has, He did and He continues to do it. I found freedom.  Those lyrics mean so much to me. I am not sure I can accurately describe the beauty of it, the freedom, the peace and safety that I feel way down deep. I’m not sure it is describable, honestly, because we have all walked different paths and experienced different wounds,  but let me assure you, once you let go and allow yourself to experience His healing, you will never be the same. Yes, you will come face to face with pain, disappointment and fear, because that is life on this planet. But know that Jesus is right there with you, as close as your next breath and will cover you with peace that passes all understanding, if you allow Him in. If you ask Him, He will give you wisdom and guidance to navigate everything life will throw at you.  He will take your ashes and give you beauty, He will give you joy for your sadness and change out that robe of heaviness for a light and lovely garment of praise. It really is supernatural, and guess what? It’s a gift!

I would be honored to hear your stories of Jesus’ saving, healing, shackle- breaking power in your life, if you would like to share.

“I will call upon the Lord, for He alone is strong enough to save….”

Call Upon the Lord by Elevation Worship

We need no other hiding place                        All of the heavens and the earth

Our hope is safe within your name                Announce the fullness of your worth

This we know, this we know                            This we know, this we know

You promise never to forsake                          And every enemy will flee

What you began you will sustain                    As we declare your victory

This we know, this we know                           This we know, this we know

I will call upon the Lord                                     I will call upon the Lord

For he alone is strong enough to save           For he alone is strong enough to save

Rise your shackles are no more                        Rise your shackles are no more

For Jesus Christ                                                      For Jesus Christ

Has broken every chain                                       Has broken every chain

Jesus’ name will break every stronghold

Freedom is ours when we call his name

Jesus’ name above every other

All hail the power of Jesus’ name

Bike ride full of sensations and truth

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

I went on a bike ride yesterday morning. The first longer one I’ve been able to do in months, due to knee and elbow injuries. It was lovely and refreshing; full of an almost overwhelming amount of much missed sensations.

I am very much a sensation person. You know, someone acutely aware of the nuances of the wind, scents, sights, sounds or the absence of sounds. Sensations fascinate me and stir something up inside. Originally, I was going to make this a ride of new beginnings in the most physical of ways; starting off with a pre-determined number of miles as my goal, so as not to overtax my knee and elbow, which are still healing and tender in spots. That was the focus and I was going to get ‘er done. No fooling around, fanciful riding! I also decided to add in to the mix, a prayer for safety and that God would use this new beginnings ride as He saw fit; whatever that means. He did. I’m pretty sure I knew deep down that He would; when I invite Him into what I am doing, He always shows up. Always.

The morning was chock full of sensations; I mean full. There was a light to moderate, persistently cooling breeze with notes of a gently sweet flower – jasmine I think, with undertones of dew damp grass and that calming scent of the sea floating along, teasing and soothing. The light was lovely. It was fairly early, so it was a new light, just waking up from its sleep; all soft, gentle and tumbly;  pleasantly warm when it hit my bare skin. The birds were in rare form, especially some blue jays with the raucous calls they are famous for, along with the pretty little birds, finches maybe, who dart and dip all over my neighborhood, singing their hearts out to the new sun. Wind chimes played in the distance and I may have imagined the earthy smell of coffee, floating by, making me wonder who was up and what they were doing. I’m also intensely curious! Some leaves danced and twirled past on a side street, as the playful breeze flew in to stir them up and left again just as quickly. Naughty and playful!

By this time, I am on the bike path parallel to the canal, trying to take in all the blue and yellow wildflowers that dip and twist in the breeze as I fly past. I realize that I have not been paying close attention to how far I’ve gone, what my knee is feeling, who else is out and about. It has just been me, my six senses and such a feeling of joy and excitement over what sight, smell, sound,  or creature I might encounter next. As I pedal along, I am struck by how much beauty and joy I rob myself of on a daily basis when all I am focused on is the next accomplishment, the next item marked off my list (I really, really like lists!!), the next thing I think I need to do because someone else is doing it, someone else thinks it would be a good idea . I am comparing my desires, my dreams and my genetic make-up, that calls and beckons me to get outside and bask in sensations’, to someone else’s make up that does not or sends them in a different direction. I felt like I had a mini epiphany that allowed me, through sensations, to see that this is good, right, ok and to not feel guilty or less than, because I choose to do life a little differently than the next guy and to embrace that and love it and deeply nurture it, because it is the essence of me. It is the spirit of me that my God put inside me when He created me. He knew I was going to crave and need nature and sensations in a big, big way along with words, dreams , music, visions and the scent of the air more than other things, and that He delighted in making me this way. I don’t have to decide to do something a different way because someone else is doing it; I don’t have to stress because I like to exercise and nourish my body, my way. I think it was such a revelation to me, because as I was riding my blue bike, feeling sweat running down my back just to be immediately cooled off by the chilly breeze, I simply thought, “why hello, Melissa. This is me.” I could see all those parts of me and loved them. So many thoughts started pouring through my brain. I won’t go into all of them, because a lot of them make sense only to me and I think God wants some of those revelations and thoughts to be just between Him and me. But thoughts regarding weight, gifting, inclinations, my ministries, friendships, past decisions, my food choices and my thoughts around those were highlighted in a gentle, yet firm way, pointing out that they stem from what God thought of and got excited over when He decided He was ready to set me loose on this earth. Yes, I do have a lot to learn from other people, things to re-think and maybe go about in a different way, but the essence of me, my spirit, is me and it’s mine and I desire to intimately know, cherish and fiercely protect every part of it; not feel like I have to explain myself, convince others to see the essence of me or to defend it.

So, God did show up on my bike ride. Like I said, I knew He would, I just didn’t know what He would bring to the party. For me, it was something deep and shifting inside. I’m not sure I did a great job explaining and sharing it, but I’m ok with that, too, because a lot of it was just for me. Maybe you will get a little nugget or tidbit for yourself. That is my hope. That through this convoluted and a bit random blog post, a little treasure will hop off the page that God put here just for you.

Come Away

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

I’m up early.

A restless, unsettled day, led to a similar night of sleep.

Rest is elusive, thoughts scattered.

Warm, earthy, steamy coffee warms my hands;  my eyes glaze over; mind swirling.

Through the open kitchen window, the morning air carries the faint scent of jasmine and cool earth.

The house is warm, but the fragrant air is inviting and full of promise; electric.

It beckons.

A friendly breeze, a puff of soft air, calls to me from the musical notes of the wind chimes,

“Come out.”

I go out.

My favorite bench is canopied by the looming butterfly bush; it’s purple, fragrant blooms toss and wave; encouraging me to come.

I do.

The cold marble of my bench, as I sit, is in stark contrast to the warmth of my hands around the child-painted coffee cup I carry with me. “I love Mommy” it proudly shouts, from its brightly painted surface. That brings a smile.

Also some tears.

I don’t feel so loveable of late.  Irritable. Tired. Frustrated, not loveable. Chaotic, possibly.

Looking at the flowers in the planter tubs next to my bench, I see chaos; at first.

Upon closer inspection, I notice that the random way in which I planted these lovelies, is actually quite beautiful.  Patterns emerge amidst the seemingly random design.

There is order here in the planter, despite the chaos and it is so lovely! Yes! Yes, it is.

Do goodness and beauty and happiness have to be meticulously ordered, spaced and arranged to be ok and acceptable?  Do I have to understand it?

This revelation makes me smile and breathe deeply. Inhale life.

The rising sun glitters its reflection at me on the feathery water of the stone bird bath. Winking and spunky, I want to laugh with it, at the possibilities of the new day.

I feel my back and shoulders relax; everything isn’t wiry and tense, ready for flight. Calm. Peace.  Is that joy?

Again the breeze; it caresses the back of my neck with cool, kind fingers; barely a whisper against my ear.

What was that?  I close my eyes, try to still my mind and just be.

I hear it now. You are speaking, but no words are spoken.

The peaceful scent of jasmine and butterfly bush blooms tell me all is well.

The stable, steady, ancient scent of dirt reminds me that new life is all around; rebirth is waiting daily for me to acknowledge it.

The breeze whispers that I’m never alone.  You will never leave me. I remember; I know.

I see in the riotous, chaotic colors and placement of the flowers, that You have patterned and woven my life together in a tapestry that may appear to be a random intersection of lines and curves; hills and dales; yet is actually something far more beautiful and ordered and perfected than I can imagine.

You see the entire picture of me and You call it lovely; You call me lovely. I am enough because of You.

You have dried my tears; they are captured in the bottle that holds all of them. In place of frustration, I notice acceptance has taken root. Not a resigned, sighing acceptance, but an acceptance of the unique journey I am on with all of the ups and downs that I know will come.

My place in Your arms as chosen, loved, accepted and redeemed is reconfirmed on my little marble bench. I am enough. I just needed to come away with You for a spell. You remind me I’m Yours and all will be well.

Just a morning

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

Sunlight filters in through the blinds; the breeze is cool and refreshing through the slightly open bedroom window.

Shifting from dreamy sleep to wakefulness; content and peace filled. Thank you Lord for waking me up – I’m coming!

Cozy cat stirs and stretches; stomping on body parts still under the covers. Time to get up. He knows the routine well.

Scent of brewing coffee brings homey memories to mind; rich and earthy, there is safety in predictability.

Dogs wait politely, then bound outdoors enjoying freedom after a long, snug night. Noses to the ground on high alert; sniffing out the offending evening invaders; dew drops spot their muzzles; glinting as the sun peeks through tree tops.

Sounds of the morning!

Wind chimes sing softly and gently as the breeze tosses itself about; birds up since dawn cling to the feeders, calling and scolding and jostling for position. Bright reds and yellows, muted greys and black.

The gentle light of early morning gives way to something  stronger; fortifying, brighter, life giving.

Coffee and the Bible sit on the pine table; steam swirls and pages flutter; beckoning and calling.

My heart stirs. There are mysteries to unravel here; richness to take in and understanding waiting to be sought and known. Revelation, peace and contentment are what I seek; warmth, depth and life.

Who knows what will come as the day unfolds? Joy? Laughter? Tears? Fear? For now, I sit at my Daddy’s feet, listening to Him speak with all my senses; sipping the warm richness of my coffee. It’s just a morning; but it is my joy.

 

 

What do you want?

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

Recently I was watching a video for a Bible study I’m doing on the book of Hosea, by Jennifer Rothschild. In the video, she told us that what we long for most, is what we already have in Christ. I have been mulling this over and swirling it about in my brain for a few weeks now because it is such an eye opening, revolutionary statement. What I long for most I already have in Christ. I already have it. Stop and read those words again. Already have it.  It actually blows my mind. I have been asking myself some thought provoking questions over the last several weeks, such as “what is it that I deeply long for and what is it that I think I don’t have?” I believe the answers go far deeper than the physical wanting of food, water and clothing. This question is begging and pleading with us to go to a soul deep level. You know that place; where putting words to the emotion, the need, the longing is almost impossible; yet it is there, always there, and it is desperate to be heard. I believe this feeling was purposely put there by God to draw us to Him, to keep us continually seeking Him and calling out to Him because we know, on that soul deep, beyond words level, that we need Him desperately. We want beyond anything else to be known.  We may not be able to put words to it, but our souls know Him. Our souls long for Him and everything He provides.

What is it that you long for most and feel like you don’t have? Is it security? Do you feel safe? Is it to be heard and known and seen? Do you feel anonymous in a big, wide world? Do you want to know that you are loved unconditionally and looked upon with eyes that adore every single fiber of your being? Do you want to know that you have a purpose; that you are NOT an accident? Do you crave acceptance? Do you need to know that you have value and worth beyond your wildest imagination, in the eyes of your Daddy? Do you crave order and chaos in a world that is wildly out of order?

You have all of these things in Christ Jesus! You are safe and secure. He commands His angels to protect you wherever you go. Nothing touches you, His masterpiece, without it first being filtered through His scarred hands; hands that were scarred to seal you to Him, to make eternal life with Him possible! He sees you, hears you and knows your every thought, fear, joy, failure and victory. Zephaniah 3:17 tells you that “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in His love He will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.” He rejoices over you! You are unconditionally loved, valued and accepted with a specific and unique purpose on your life that only you were created to fulfill. What time, tender care and attention God took, as you were created and the breath of life was breathed into your lungs. It is His breath in your lungs. You have a purpose. Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jesus is the Prince of Peace and can bring order, calm and peace to every situation. In the midst of the greatest pain and confusion life throws at you, He is there in the midst of it, offering you His love, His peace and safety. His wisdom is available as is His peace, if you just ask Him. Talk to Him. He is your Daddy and best friend. The true lover of your soul. Think deep about what it is you think you don’t have, what it is you long for most, and then look to Jesus. Ask Him to show you that you have it. You have all that you need because He is more than enough. Peace and blessings, friends.

Faces of Peace

~ Extravagant Hope ~ 1 Comment

I am on a constant journey to find peace. It is something I crave on a soul deep, inner man deep, level. It is difficult to describe, but it is there and it is insistent.  I search for rest, because I am weary. It is not always the feeling of overwhelming exhaustion or the desperation of drowning kind of weariness, but sometimes it is. Life is showing me that peace has many different faces and it invades every situation. It can be quiet and unobserved, waiting to be noticed and when it is noticed, brings surprise and a deep sense of well-being. This happens in the wee hours of the morning, while rocking a tired, cranky baby; back and forth, back and forth, praying for rest and calm until suddenly you feel it – peace. It was there waiting, gently and softly. Rest. Peace. Joy. Love. All is well, you are safe and secure. Sheltered.

Peace is there on an ordinary day, when things are flowing smoothly and life is pleasant and people are kind. Peace was there before the day started off well, before everyone got up and got ready for work and school on time, before lunches were remembered and PE clothes were grabbed on the way out the door, before the house emptied and things were quiet. Peace was already there, waiting and present and real.

Peace is there in the absence of storms, just as real and alive and powerful, as it is in the midst of grueling trials and storms that seem to have no end. Peace is there, strong and powerful and full of compassion, when the Doctor opens the door to your room, takes a deep breath and says, “I’m so sorry. You have breast cancer.” It is there. Peace is what keeps you from losing yourself to terror when desperation blasts in and you feel like you are drowning and have no control. Peace is there in the middle of the fears of the “what-if’s” saying, “Yes! What if you are healed? What if you are well taken care of and deeply loved, what if you are never, ever alone in the midst of this, what if you are held in arms that are bigger than all your fears, what if you have shelter in the midst of all this hurt and chaos? What if? What if…

Peace reminds you that it was there before this storm hit and it will be there forever after. Peace lifts your face and asks you to fasten your gaze steadily into the eyes of Jesus, the Prince of Peace. It is Jesus, peace is Jesus. Such calm, such safety, such lovely rest.

On this journey of mine, I have discovered time and again, that my searching and desire for peace leads directly to Jesus.  Every single time. I won’t find it inside myself, in my own strength. That will fall short every time. I know. I have tried over and over to be self-reliant and strong enough. The One who created me, when I was but a thought in His mind, the One who formed every single part of me, all my weaknesses and failings and all my strengths and gifts – He wants me to feel peace, to feel Him working out all things for good, according to that beautiful, unique plan that is my life. Your life. The time He took to carefully place us right where we are, surrounded by the people and circumstances that He brought into being, tells me that He knows what He is doing. He is the Master planner. He knows how it all ends. We win because He is victorious over death and sin. It is good. He’s got me, He’s got you. It is ok to not know what to do, if you know the One who does. It is ok to not have it figured out and planned and plotted. He already did that. It’s done. Can you and I walk this out? The not knowing? We can. We do it every day, don’t we? We wake up and just go. However, the going is so much easier when we understand and truly believe that He has us in His hands and that nothing, nothing at all, comes toward us, His children, that He has not first filtered through hands of love, a mind of infinite wisdom and a heart that loves us so intensely, intimately and fiercely, that He allowed His beloved Son to die for us, to take all this on for us, to forgive us and to become our Peace. This is a wild love. It is not tame and it is not controllable. Yet, in this fierce and protective love, we find the greatest of peace. Jesus.

Melissa Giomi, October 7, 2015

A Silent Night

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

The cabin is cozy; a quiet room with gently snoring dogs on soft beds.

A warm blanket with a purring cat.

The fire glows brightly; dancing colors mesmerize and hypnotize.

A favorite comfy chair; dog eared book on the table.

All is warm and pleasant.

Steaming cup of tea warms the body and soul.

Tree lights softly wink in the branches. Magical. Enchanting.

Wandering mind recalls vivid scenes of Christmases past;

pine-scented memories of the perfect tree; lights and cherished ornaments sparkle;

mugs of creamy cocoa; floating marshmallows.

The homey smells of holiday baking and coffee.

Christmas carols on the record player.

Memories of laughter, anticipation; such hope on Christmas Eve… Light of the world; blessed hope; holy and sacred.

Cat stirs and stretches, fire pops and crackles busily.

Peaceful evening flows on, past and present thoughts mix and blend; drowsy.

The distinctive sound of falling snow on this silent night.

Something to ponder…

~ Extravagant Hope ~ Leave a comment

Someone needs to hear this tonight or maybe it’s just for me… God loves you. He made you. He knows everything about you and loves all of it. Your weaknesses and struggles are not driving Him away from you. He is there always, as close as your next breath. You are seen and known and have God’s undivided attention. You name is engraved on the palms of His hands. You have tremendous value and purpose. You are here for a reason. God makes no mistakes. You are not a random happening. Those places in your heart that hurt; the place in your soul that has been so wounded has not gone unnoticed by God. He saw, He knows and He grieves.  If you give it to Him, He will take it and redeem it; He wants to do this for you. He can restore and transform those places that seem too lost, too broken, and too ugly. The secret hurt isn’t hidden from Him. He is “the God who gives life to the dead and calls things that are not as though they were.”(1) He knows all about the anger, the bitterness and resentments; failures and victories and joyful A-ha moments. He looks on you with eyes of love, compassion, joy and mercy. You are His greatest delight and lovely treasure. You are His child. Your voice is music, love and joy to Him. Talk to Him; He loves to listen. You are covered in grace, redeemed and delivered and so very loved by God. Sit with these thoughts for a bit. Let them permeate and percolate into your mind, spirit and body.  Rest in these words and flourish!

“The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” (2) .

(1) Romans 4:17 b  (2) Zephaniah 3:17

Sanctuary

~ Extravagant Hope ~ 2 Comments

Sanctuary

I sit in the sanctuary of my heart, still, waiting for You. I long for Your presence, Your words, Your breath, Your kisses.  My heart once was a fearful place, but because of You Jesus, it has become a refuge, a safe place, my peace. It is a place that I long to go because You are there. I will shout to the mountain tops all that You have done; to You be the glory, Jesus.

I no longer fear what is and was in my heart nor try to deny it exists. You hold out Your hands to receive it – the damage, the sin, the struggles, the fear; the place where deep hurts and secrets dwell.  You are not afraid.  You smile as I hand them over; some quickly and with ease, others with hesitation and still others that take time, as I painfully and deliberately choose to release them to You, one finger at a time, one muscle at a time. What you do with these things of mine I am not entirely sure, but I do know You want them, every one and You, in Your abounding mercy and mind blowing love, take them and transform all that I thought was lost, used up and devastated beyond hope, into a thing of rare and poignant beauty, so precious and sacred to You that Your Spirit hovers over Your redeemed and transformed work, nurturing it, breathing life, wisdom and power over it; releasing authority and boldness into it and forever changing me.

How can I be the same when Your holiness, grace and sovereignty intercept me in my humanity, frailty and poverty? “Not possible!” my spirit shouts.  Not possible.  To be in Your presence for but a moment leaves Your fragrance, Your taste, Your fingerprints everywhere!  How could this not be my greatest desire?  But…life, busyness and superficiality also vie for my attention and the battle is hard.  Yet, Your Spirit which watches over the transformation is constantly at work, even if Your voice seems distant.  You are still shouting Your delight over me, rejoicing above me and dancing all around me. Will I choose to still my heart and mind long enough to hear You speak in the wind, feel Your touch in it’s caress, catch Your scent in the flowers, dance before You with no shame? Will I be still long enough and choose to trust You enough to take my hidden hopes and treasured dreams and place them in Your outstretched hands? You placed them in my heart. You have given me visions, dreams and desires too deep to name, yet You ask for them back.  Yes, Abba, I will give them to You. For You are good, You are faithful, You are truth and the lover of my soul.  Only You can give wings to the plans You have for me. You say that “no eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him.”(1) Oh, how I love You and oh, how I want what You have prepared for me.  Jesus, Your love has captivated me, ravished my heart.  Because of Calvary, undeserved sacrifice, grace and mercy I will never comprehend, love that freely flows from Your throne and pours into and continues to heal a scarred yet hopeful heart, I can sit here in peace and safety calling my heart Your sanctuary. Thank You, Jesus for the treasure You revealed in what was once a lonely and desolate place. Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom!

 

~ Melissa Giomi, June 2009

(1) 1 Cor. 2:9

Letting Him Love Me

~ Extravagant Hope ~ 8 Comments

In May of 2009, is when I really began to write down all the things I felt God was talking to me about. I really sensed that He had things to say that He wanted me to write down and share. Except for a small, select group of friends, I did not share my writing with anyone else. It is a very vulnerable place to be when you share deep, personal thoughts and feelings and I was afraid to do it. Honestly, I still am a little afraid to do it, but I will.

This first short writing is something that I experienced with Jesus on an annual women’s retreat that I go to almost every year without fail. It happens in the Northern California Redwoods and is so breathtakingly beautiful, if you have not seen and experienced it yourself, it is hard to describe. I love the smell and sounds of the Redwoods. The peace and power and majesty of nature in this area is really beyond compare and it is a perfect place to experience and connect with God on so many levels. My hope is that as you read this short bit, you will sense and begin to know how much Jesus delights in you and finds you lovely and fabulous and how He loves to just hang out with us, whether we are deep in the Redwoods or going about our busy days. He just digs you!!!

Here you go – enjoy!

I went to retreat in 2009 with a lot of expectations on God.  I wanted to hear His voice and have Him explain and define things for me that I was going through, because this is what He and I have always done and it’s what I wanted Him to do again.

I have my routine down for each retreat.  On Saturday afternoon, I go on a hike by myself to be alone with the Jesus.  This year I planned to do the same thing I always do and go to the same place I always go to pour out my heart, hurt and requests to Him.  Jesus, however, had something very different in store for me.  I reached the general area where I usually sit, but it didn’t feel right, so I kept moving.  The trail was so beautiful and peaceful I didn’t want to stop. Then I happened to spot a little open area off the trail, where I could walk down and sit right above the stream that runs alongside it.  As I climbed down, I knew this was the place and my heart was overflowing with anticipation of meeting with my Daddy…what was He going to say to me, what was He going to reveal and work out and explain?  I got myself comfortable and sat waiting for Him, examining my surroundings.  This place was very isolated and quiet, almost undetectable by anyone walking along the main trail. Interesting, I thought, no one can see me here; I’m hidden.  I kept waiting and asking Him to speak, telling Him that I was listening, ready and all set for Him.  I heard nothing.  So I waited a bit more, sitting and thinking that I was starting to feel very hot.  I was  annoyed that Jesus wasn’t speaking yet, because that was not how we usually do things.  In the next moment, a very subtle, gentle, cool breeze began blowing over me at just the perfect temperature.  I didn’t notice much of a breeze anywhere else, just right here.  Interesting, I thought, it’s like this breeze is just for me.  Then I sensed Him say, “It is just for you, beautiful one, how I love you.”  Speechless.  I had nothing to say.  All my expectations were forgotten.  All my carefully thought out conversations with Him were wrecked and so was I.  All I wanted to do was worship and adore Him and I did. I sang to Him and praised Him. I spoke out all my love and deepest desires for Him and He absolutely received it, lavished it back on me and wrecked me some more.  I asked Him if I was beautiful and graceful to Him, in all my stumbling and trying and falling and I sensed deep within me, that I know like I know, that I am all those things to Him and more. I was overwhelmed.  I never saw myself like that.  In my spirit I knew I had His undivided attention in that quiet, hidden away place by the stream, where no one could see me but Him and it was perfect.

My off key singing delighted Him, my praise and worship pleased Him and my spirit was so full of Him that I never wanted to leave that spot.  I believe that He showed me the power of praise in that secreted away place.  Abandoning myself to love Him and delight in Him, brought me more healing, peace and joy than time spent speaking out my hurt, fears and requests to Him could have done.   Loving Him opened wide my heart to receive His love for me.  I am learning to love Him on a new, higher level and am falling deeper into believing how much He really loves me.  I knew He had something for me at this retreat, and what He taught me, on Saturday afternoon by the stream, was how to let Him love me.  Will you let Him love you?